What is this all about? The implication is that without this marvelous product we are all listless zombies going through life at 70% efficiency. Since an average person is awake 16 hrs a day, shouldn’t there be a second product to fill this gap? Do I need 3 of these drinks during waking hours to fulfill my potential? If taken at bedtime do I need to sleep at all?

Absent a concise definition of “energy” such claims seem unfounded or, at best, impossible to prove. Was this energy scientifically calibrated in: Calories? Footpounds? Amps? Horsepower? Sticks of Dynamite? The ad claims 5-Hour Energy has no sugar. Is it time released, radioactive or a toxic chemical soup? Theoretically, if I carried an AA battery around in my pocket that would give me 1.5 volts of energy for years.

Is this product a food or beverage? I would argue that it is unsatisfying as food and too slight to quench thirst. So it is simply a $3 addition to normal nourishment. What need does it really fulfill then? Couldn’t you also get hours of energy from a cheese sandwich? And that would taste good. Couldn’t a day-glow label on a carrot or pretzel make the same claim?

Finally, what about hours 1 through 4? Six is already a reality. Can 7 and beyond be far behind? Once we get to 24 the need for sleep will be eliminated and the entire planet will be 33% more productive. ….Or watch TV for 8 hours more each day.

-AC